Painting by Igor Voloshin
This is the most nerve wracking but necessary post I have ever dreamed of putting on social media. I've had the idea to do it for the last few weeks but have totally chickened out, well, for obvious reasons. In the end tho, it's important for me to try to make a difference and influence positivity. I woke up this morning in a better place than I have been even two months ago. I've really been working toward living a healthy life with a good state of mind. I have struggled. I have struggled with dépression, and eating disorders for a very long time. I have lived a life full of resentment, hurt, and self harm and I'm only 16 years old... To those struggling with mental illness, self harm... it can get better even if it's so hard because it's a constant process of waking up and reminding yourself that this world is worth living in. It's taking ten, fifty, hundred moments a day to stop and just appreciate the people and things that surround you. For me it was hard because I became so cynical with the world and began to turn a blind eye to the good things this life has to offer. It's hard. It's so hard everyday and it will continue being hard everyday that I'm breathing and walking. But the mere fact that I'm even doing those things is what keeps me going. I want to help. I want to be an advocate for mental illness and those who self harm. I love my skin and I love my scars because they represent a huge obstacle I had to overcome. I'm not posting this for the attention or for people to feel sorry for me. In fact that was one of my biggest hesitations in posting this because I don't want anyone to see me as weak. My depression doesn't make me a charity case or a crazy person. In fact, I think it puts me at more of an advantage to make a difference. I want to help and I want to show people that things like this are okay. Scars on your legs, arms, wrists etc. ARE OKAY. I am not ashamed with them and I'm no longer scared to show them. Please if you struggle with anything, just know that you're not alone !